Milk, sulphate and Alby Starvation

Title: Milk, sulphate and Alby Starvation
Author: Martin Millar
Published: 1987 by Fourth Estate (this edition from 1994)
Genre: Humorous fiction
Pages: 152


Apparently it's Millar season for me! Was visiting the parental units while reading Suzy, Led Zeppelin and me, and since it was there, I picked up Alby after finishing Suzy. 

So, second time reading one of my all-time facourites in English, and I'm still loving it. (Here's my last report: linky!) Alby's paranoid towards everything and everyone, except for his hamster Happy, sure that people are after him for his invaluable comic book collection. Not to mention that they are literally ready to kill him because he gave milk a bad name. Really, there's an assassin after him!

Having read Alby straight after one of Millar's later works, it does have bit of a first novel -feel to it, but it still makes me happy, still makes me giggle, and even though I do pretty much remember everything by now, well, obviously I still want to go back to it. Again and agaaaaaaaain!


All this talk of hired killers worries me a bit at the time, though when I think about it rationally my fears diminish a little, I mean, surely the Milk Marketing Board isn't really going to hire someone to kill me? How could they hide the expense on their tax returns? 
   Maybe they wouldn't have to hide it. It might be a legitimate business practice under the Conservatices. They might even offer incentives.

The Cartier Project

Title: The Cartier Project
Author: Miha Mazzini
Published: 1987, English translation in 2004 by Scala House Press
Genre: Man on a mission.
Pages: 216


The SO and I went on a trip to Ljubljana, Slovenia this August, and I bought this puppy from a cool little mostly English book shop called the Behemot. Worth checking out if you're in town! And Ljubljana itself is really worth checking out, so while you're in the neighbourhood anyway...

The Cartier Project is set in times when Slovenia was still a part of Yugoslavia. Egon writes trashy novels and bums his friends and acquaintances for beer and other bare necessities of life. His one extravagance is his Cartier perfume, and guess what, that just ran out. Perfume costs money, though, but Egon is ready to fo whatever it takes to get some. Including stealing Playboys, blackmailing friends by threatening their, ahem, vegetable patches with the police, and publishing books.

Apparently this book's very Bukowskian: I can't say since I haven't popped my Bukowski-cherry yet. But it was fun and quick, even though Millar and Led Zeppelin distracted me, and Egon was a delightfully decadent narrator.


   "Are you coming?" I shouted. Ibro was bent over looking for something on the ground.
   "Fucking hell, I lost the dice!" he shouted and went on rummaging around like a chicken in the weak light of the streetlights.
   Through my drunken brain a flash of recognition. History is a circle, not of people, but of events which are repeated over and over. What once Caesar did was now repeated by Ibro.
   "Found them," reported Ibro, out of breath. We jumped on the bus. Sat on the front seats. The driver drove off. A fresh breeze pleasantly ruffled our hair. I was sitting next to Selim, squashed against the side of the bus. His shoulders took up a seat and a half. 
   Selim lifted the beer and me through the window of the dormitory.

Suzy, Led Zeppelin and me (again!)

Title: Suzy, Led Zeppelin and me
Author: Martin Millar
Published: 2008 by Soft Skull Press
Genre: Biography & gig review
Pages: 222


I actually gave away my last copy of this book, to a friend. Gosh, hope he liked it! Got an urge to read it again -and to have my Millar-collection whole again- so I bought a used library copy from the big book-store on the internets.

Here's what I wrote last time: link! The plot is still the same, big surprise, but this time 'round I knew more about the band, and caught the reference to The Good Fairies of New York (this one). I still really liked the book, and am again wishing for a good gig to come my way. Ahem, favourite bands of mine who are currently touring but are not coming to Finland and why not?


   It might be Elvis Presley, the Rolling Stones, or Public Enemy. Maybe the night you heard Kemistry and Storm DJ was the best night you ever had. The Manic Street Preachers, the Smiths, the Sex Pistols, Todd Terry, Marilyn Manson, or any number of people. The band who made life bearable when you were skulking in your bedroom with the rest of the world against you. At least one time in your life everything was perfect.
   Led Zeppelin in Glasgow. Before it I was frustrated and after it I was disappointed. But when the band played, everything was right.