A Rope of Thorns

Title: A Rope of Thorns
Author: Gemma Files
Published: 2011 by ChiZine, 2012 for the Kindle
Genre: Weird Weird West!
Pages: 350


Second Hexslinger book! Eek! I'm finding it a little hard to think of something to write without plenty of spoilers. Also, I'm already well into the third one, and it's a bit hazy where exactly this one ended and the third started.

No, that's a lie. I do actually remember where exactly this one ended. Spoiler territory. So deep in spoiler territory. The story takes a bit of a breather in A Rope of Thorns, the middle book of three, but don't take that to any way imply that it's slow going or boring. The way Files places those darn words one after the other is mesmerizing: you forget the real world as she sucks you in to this dark, dry place where the red weed grows and blood runs like water on the ground. We're introduced to a few new characters, and some old faces come back to cause trouble. There were a few giggles as well along the way, and plennnty of Chess. I'm very fond of the pocket-sized Satan. Yessir.

One thing I have to mention is all the new words I've never seen/read anywhere. I'm really happy about the Kindle's dictionary-feature that lets me check all these wonderful new words immediately. Quotidian. Diablerie. Sybaritic. Inchoate. Foofaraw! Indefatigably! What? Not like I remember all the meanings, but I can always go back and check.


   "Chesssss Paaaaaaargeter!"
   Yancey staggered to Chess's side, trying her level best to figure exactly what he was staring at, but the darkness defeated her. While he stayed right where he was, surprisingly unsurprised.
   Remarking to her sidelong, with admirable calm --"Never did think it'd happen, back when notoriety was a fair trade for bein' talked up in every bandit hole from here to Tlaquepacque . . . but I'm gettin' damnable sick of the sound of my own name."

Reaper Man

Title: Reaper Man
Author: Terry Pratchett
Published: Originally 1991, 2009 for the Kindle
Genre: Fa-ha-ha-ha!ntasy
Pages: 356


Needed a bit of a breather somewhere between the first two Hexslinger books, so why not a classic Pratchett? Discworld is always a nice place to visit, and who doesn't love Death?

The grey-cloaked auditors are poking around again (or rather, before, since Hogfather came after this one), and Death decides to take a holiday among the living. He has always picked up dying wizards in person, but when it's time for old Windle Poons to shuffle off his mortal coil, there's no sign of tall, dark and kinda skinny. Actually, no one seems to be dying, while tall, dark and kind of very skinny Bill Door is happily working for old Miss Flitworth.

People -and everything else that has a life- not dying start to become a problem, though, as the excess life force has to go somewhere. And so must the not-so-dead, like Windle, who is starting to enjoy his un-life.

I've read Reaper Man a few times in Finnish as a kid/teenager, and this was the first time in English.


   Ridcully silently passed him the brandy.
   "Just between the two of us," said the priest, "have you got any ideas about all this? The guards are trying to dig his lordship out. You know he'll want answers. I'm not even certain I know the questions."
   "Not magic and not gods," said Ridcully. "Can I have the snare back? Thank you. Not magic and not gods. That doesn't leave us much, does it?"
   "I suppose there's not some kind of magic you don't know about?"
   "If there is, we don't know about it."
   "Fair enough," the priest conceded.

A Book of Tongues

Title: A Book of Tongues
Author: Gemma Files
Published: 2010by ChiZine Publications
Genre: Weird Weird West!
Pages: 274


I know it's early days yet, but I'm gonna go ahead and say that this is my favourite book for 2015. Pretty darn confident of that. Kind of sad, what with all the rest not having a chance, but such is life.


A Book of Tongues (xmas/bday present #3) is the first book in the Hexslinger series, set in the weird West soon after the Civil War. Pinkerton agent Ed Morrow has been sent to infiltrate the outlaw gang of infamous 'Reverend' Asher Rook, hanged preacher turned hexslinger. Morrow's task is to map Rook's power, better to understand magic, but the outlaw life, and especially Rook's lieutenant (and lover) Chess Pargeter, are not without their charms. Rook is powerful but still inexperienced as a hexslinger, using the Bible verses he so well knows as his 'spells'. He is also haunted by a dead goddess, looking to walk the world again, and promising her 'little king' a place on her side in return for his help.

I bought the Kindle Omnibus version when I was about halfway through, and jumped straight to the second book after finishing. This was such a hooking ride, I was pulled in by the time the first corpse hit the floor. I can see how it won't be everyone's cup of tea, this book, with strange and scary goddesses and gods, bible verses flying around, and the very graphic gay sex and violence. But(t) fuck it, this is so very much just my cup of dark tea with a spot of milk and Bailey's. A wild ride with surprises behind every corner. As I write this, I'm well into Book Three already.


   "Sheriff Love believes in a good God, no doubt." Chess didn't answer. "Okay, then how's this: I find I might still believe in the Lord myself, Chess, down deep. Hate to disappoint."
   Did he, though? The Lord, yes, but a good God? A forgiving one? 
   God is always good, Brother Rook, the old preacher in his home town had once told him, so long ago. And He always wants to forgive. It's just that we so seldom allow Him that opportunity.

   Rook felt a vague knot form in his chest, right where his heart should be. Didn't want to think too hard on that, though, so he looked over at Chess, instead, smiling at the thought of his pocket-sized Satan ever begging forgiveness--and the knot swelled up even higher, bruising his lungs, making his stomach clench. 
   "As for God," Chess said, "you choose t'believe in him, that's all well 'n' good, I s'pose. Does he believe in you, though? My personal bet would be--not like I do."
   But to that, of course, there was nothing to say.

Dolly Dingle, Lesbian Landlady

Title: Dolly Dingle, Lesbian Landlady
Author: Monica Nolan
Published: 2014
Genre: Pulp fiction!
Pages: 247


Another xmas present! This one came out at the end of November 2014, just in time for the holidays, and it's even set during them!

Dolly has lived in the Magdalene Arms Residence for Women for years, waiting for her acting career to pick up again. But when the landlady, old Mrs. DeWitt breaks her hip and ends up in the hospital, someone has to take her place as the housemother. Dolly to the rescue! To her surprise, it's a part that she plays very well! But there are monetary worries in the horizon: the board of trustees, one cranky lady in particular, are looking to close down the Magdalena Arms, wreck it, and build modern condos on its place. Dolly and the dwellers have to put their heads together and figure out how to rescue their beloved house. And, of course, there are more than one among them who have caught Dolly's attention.

I may have mentioned it before, but I just love these books. So much. They're funny, quick-paced, steamy and still so... innocent. Characters from previous books are present in this one, too, and alliteration all around!


   Her sudden brainstorm was like a blinding flash of light in the dim kitchen. Talent! The Arms was overflowing with talent! They'd do what Mrs. DeWitt and her acting pals had done in the days of the Depression---they'd pay for the repairs by putting on a benefit, this time raising money for the Arms instead of Spanish Loyalists!
   Dolly raced up the stairs and burst into the lounge, startling both the aspiring thespians and a group of girls engaged in a hand of pinochle.
   "Hey, kids," she beamed. "How about we put on a show?"

The Hardest Thing

Title: The Hardest Thing
Author: James Lear
Published: 2013 by Turnaround Books
Genre: Mystery with plenty of cocks.
Pages: 256


Finished this one at around 21:00 on the 31st of December, 2014, so this should still be counted into 2014. I got 4 books from Santa/birthday fairy, and this was one of them! (Halfway through two others already.)

Dan Stagg's promising army career came to an end when his feelings for another soldier came out. Down on his luck, he worked as a bouncer in New York until one idiot started picking a fight. Now really screwed (and not even getting paid a lot for that), Dan agrees to become a personal bodyguard to a young 'secretary' whose life is in danger. Plenty of money to be earned, and hell, the 'secretary' isn't half bad looking underneath the fake tan and hair bleach.

Set in the current times and in NY instead of the early last century of the Mitch Mitchell Mysteries (the first of which was the first book of this journal!), The Hardest Thing is just as much fun and just as fucking enjoyable as everything else I've read from Mr. Lear. Read over half of it in one sitting, on New Year's eve. 'Cause that's how I like to party.


   "What are you going to do now, Kenny?"
   "I don't know."
   "You going to tell the cops what you found?"
   He shrugged, looked up at me. He wanted something, but he didn't know how to ask for it.
   "We can work something out." It sounded unbelievably corny, but subtlety can waste time. The posse could be riding back into town right now, and if they noticed Kenny was gone someone might decide to take a look at the old hunting cabin.
   "Yeah?"
   "You keep your mouth shut about what you saw," I said, "and you can suck my dick."
   The words fell like stones in still water. Ripples of emotion traveled across Kenny's face.
   "For real?"


Oh, for real, Kenny. The crowd calls out for MORE!

Year 2014!

Another year is over! It passed so fast with all these good books to read. Here's a look, with a meme I found on the net.


1. Best Book of 2014 – Nineteen Eighty-four by George Orwell. I was hooked from the start, hooked, disturbed and terrified. I learned that 'palimpsest' is an actual word. I wanted to read it again as soon as I'd finished it. Well, after getting over the ending, anyway.

2. Worst Book of 2014 – That would be the one I stopped reading halfway through, after I realised I didn't care what happens in it. I still don't want to name it, I want to give it another chance in case it was just my mood that was making it sour.

3. Most Disappointing Book of 2014 – Huonosti käyttäytyvät jumalat/Gods behaving badly, by Marie Phillips. It wasn't bad and I did like it, it had great and funny ideas. Maybe I'm also disappointed in what I read about the movie version. 

4. Most surprising (in a good way) book of 2014 – The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time, by Mark Haddon. I'd heard about it and wanted to check it out, but I didn't think I'd like it quite as much as I do. I want to re-read it already (along with a few others from 2014...).

5. Book you recommended to people most in 2014 – Staalo by Stefan Spjut. A Swedish thriller/urban fantasy about trolls. I know that at least one person read it!

6. Best series you discovered in 2014 – Ben Aaronovitch's books about Peter Grant, police officer/wizard in London. Funny, fast and full of London. What's not to love? Third book waiting to be read!

7. Favourite new authors you discovered in 2014 – So many! Jackie Kay, Ben Aaronovitch, Stefan Spjut, Wesley Stace... I'd pick up a book by any of them without hesitation.

8. Most hilarious read of 2014 – Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett. Always funny.

9. Most thrilling, unputdownable book in 2014 – There were quite many of those, too, but to name one I haven't mentioned yet, Dark Matter by Michelle Paver. Proper scary, too. Thanks to summer holiday, I could read most of it in one sitting.

10. Book you most anticipated in 2014 – Fool's Assassin by Robin Hobb, reason why I spent a few months happily re-reading her earlier works. It was nice to meet old favourite characters again. Like seeing old friends.

11. Favourite cover of a book you read in 2014 – It's probably Aaronovitch's Rivers of London, for the wonderful map. Have I mentioned that I love London? Like, in the last five minutes? All the books in the series have similar covers.

12. Most memorable character in 2014 – It would be really easy to say the Fool from Robin Hobb's books. The Fool has been my favourite of the series, and on a grander scale as well, for years. In any form/persona. I really loved Rose Old from Misfortune as well, and cared deeply for Max from Golden Boy. And how could I ever forget Winston Smith from Nineteen Eighty-four. But, let's go with the Fool.

13. Most beautifully written book in 2014 – Why Don't You Stop Talking by Jackie Kay. Short stories that still lasted lifetimes.

14. Book that had the greatest impact on you in 2014 – I can't think of just one, one that would have truly shook my world, but there were many that made me give it a good look from a bit of a different angle, maybe to understand a few new thing: Nineteen Eighty-four, of course, Lois Lowry's The Giver Quartet, The Curious Incident..., and The Quarry by Iain Banks.

15. Book you can’t believe you waited until 2014 to finally read? – Nineteen Eighty-four by George Orwell. What else am I missing out on?



That's 2014 done! My goal was to read more books than in 2013, and I certainly topped that! I read more in 2014 than in any year I've been keeping this journal. Whee! Goal for 2015, reading-wise, is to enjoy it, and to get on with The List. Maybe another Reading Bingo, since it was so much fun!